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This week, Write on Edge challenges me to write a 400 word piece where fate plays a role in the story. Like last week, I'm using Snapshots. This time, it's a scene from the actual story. Enjoy and don't forget to check out the other participants.


Across from me was a three-story brick building taking up most of the block with a tall fence surrounding it. Yellow buses were lined in front of the building, their engines idling. Faintly, I heard a bell ring. The sounds of chaos filled the air as people piled out of the building.

I jogged across the street during a lull in traffic and propped myself against the fence. Most of the students headed for the buses, but others headed for a parking lot along the side of the building. Laughter and chatter filled the air. The happiness caught on the fence, unable to reach me.

I spotted Amber with a group of friends. Jealously flared in my chest as a boy slung his arm over her shoulder. A goofy grin filled his face and his eyes were only for her. Both eyes, I noted bitterly. Some of my envy faded when she shrugged his arm off and put distance between them. More melted when she noticed me; a smile brightening her face.

The moment she turned away from me, probably to excuse herself from her friends to join me, I felt a presence next to me. I didn’t have to look to know who stood next to me. A part of me would always know when my master was near. I kept my gaze on Amber, watching her and wanting to prolong the moment.

In my mind, I pushed away from the fence, leaving my master behind, and made my way through the flow of students to her. I swept her into my arms and tilted her back for a kiss that would rival those seen in romance movies. I’d tell her I loved her, words we had yet to say to each other. Then we’d go to her apartment or mine where I’d help her with homework before spending the rest of the evening cuddled in each other’s arms.

Master laid a hand on my arm and led me away. I didn’t resist or fight as the life I wanted but wasn’t mine slipped away. Not because I had no will to resist, but because of the fear slithering through me like a snake. My fear wasn't of what he would do to me, but fear of what he would do to Amber.
 


Comments

06/16/2012 12:37am

Nice job. I like how you show the scene playing out in his mind in counterpoint to what happens in real life. One minor concrit - spell check missed in the third paragraph it says "Jealously" rather than Jealousy".

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06/16/2012 12:41am

Thanks.
*shakes fist at typos*

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06/16/2012 2:33pm

I like the flashes of setting and the idea that happiness can't reach the protag through the fence. I love that it's a manifestation of the other barriers as well. Nicely done!

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06/16/2012 5:32pm

Thanks. The happiness getting stuck on the fence was one of my favorite lines in the story.

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06/17/2012 10:14pm

"The happiness caught on the fence . . . " Genuis! Brillant line. The entire piece was enjoyable, but that line summed it all up. Great work!

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